Inside The Actor's Taglines FEATURING Rob Schneider

Here at TagLine Idiots we revel in the absurdity of individual taglines, but I was thinking, why not look at an actor's entire career and blast them as a whole. For the first edition of what we will now be calling, INSIDE THE ACTOR'S TAGLINES we will be focusing on the one and only Rob Schneider. This comic mastermind has been making us laugh for over 20 years now (I really can't believe that) with his (I guess you could call it) unique brand of physical and total goof humor. Now if you're thinking that this is just a forum to rip the Schneid, you're wrong. This blog has nothing but respect for the man who has played such characters as an Asian Minister (I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry), a Middle Eastern cab driver (Zohan), a southern hick (The Waterboy), a Hawaiian with one eye (50 First Dates), and a delivery driver of some eastern European descent (Big Daddy). Now without further a do, the posters and taglines that made Rob Schneider the man we know and love today:

This is just simply classic photoshop absurdity, paired with a tagline that works for the entire movie. I don't know about you but there is no group I would want saving the world more than burned out surfers wielding swords and sharing their boards. SURFS UP BRA, TIME TO DISARM A NUKE, HIT THE GRAVITY BONG, AND CUT SOME MOTHERFUCKERS.

Classic throwaway tagline here, but does anyone else see an upside down dick in the art here. Come on, think about it. There you go. On to the next one.

At this point we get Schneider's artistic peak, but tagline low in terms of creativity. Even though it is very true, seeing as Rob wouldn't be physically appealing even after drinking all of Mexico's tequila and mainlining a barrel full of grain alcohol, it just seems lazy. Personally I still find this movie funny as all hell, and I will always remember that scene when Deuce meets the 'that's a huge bitch,' bitch. Classic Schneid.

This is when we get his tagline best. Simple. Elegant. All around Rob Schneider. Way to go my man, way to go. I can't hate on this poster or tagline at all. The movie is a whole different subject. We will leave it for another time...he has his FUCKING human parts replaced with animals parts and that makes him an animal. People are animals fucktards, jesus. Alright, now I'm done.

Again just terribly lazy, but wait one fucking minute Anna Faris and Rachel McAdams are in this flick? Who Knew? No one, because no one saw this terrible, terrible movie.

And last, but not least, a huge fucking dick joke to go along with another lazy tagline. We get it, he's not worth the pennies you would have to pay to fuck him. He's hideous, but we all still have to love him somehow.


And there you have it, some of Rob Schneider's greatest tagline hits. We now know that they were mostly misses but we can't help but look back on his still evolving career and only hope for the best. Here's to you Rob and all your doofy brilliance. Can't wait to see what you've got for us next (not really). We leave you with one last thing, a montage of Adam Sandler giving the Schneid work doing the same joke in multiple movies. Thanks a lot friends.

FAIL